Just A Toy In A Game Of Revenge

Her memory remained sharp, like a wound that refused to heal. She had been sitting in the tub, water cooling around her, waiting. Hoping. If he cared, he would come to her. He would reach out his hand, wrap her in a towel, and tell her everything would be okay. But he didn’t. He just walked away.

Funny how people push others away without knowing why, how the world keeps spinning while some remain stuck, trapped in loneliness of their own making.

There was something eerie about online connections. People claimed it was impossible to form a real bond with someone they’d never met, but she knew better. Sometimes, those connections felt more real than anything in the physical world—soothing, even life-saving. Until, suddenly, they weren’t.

One moment, he had been her refuge, the one who understood her in ways no one else did. The next, he was a stranger, cold and distant. The shift had been so abrupt, so unexpected, that it left her gasping for answers that would never come. She had trusted him, let him in, made herself vulnerable in ways she never had before. And he had used it all against her.

She had seen this kind of betrayal before, though she hadn’t recognized it at the time. Like the grandmother who turned a blind eye to cruelty within her family, she, too, had ignored the signs, dismissing the red flags as paranoia. Now, she saw the truth—how easily people could twist kindness into a weapon, leaving their victims trapped in a cycle of self-doubt and confusion.

The hypervigilance became suffocating. Every notification, every message sent a jolt of anxiety through her system. Were they watching her? Hacking her accounts? Spying on her through the cracks of her online existence? The fear was constant, gnawing at the edges of her sanity. And just when she thought she had finally broken free, another email, another text would pull her back in.

“This is what they want,” she murmured to herself, staring at yet another anonymous message. “To wear me down until I break. To make me feel so lost that I come crawling back.”

She wouldn’t give them that satisfaction. Not anymore.

Somewhere along the way, she had begun to see it for what it was—a game. A cruel, calculated game meant to strip her of her strength. And yet, the realization made their tactics weaker, the pain less consuming. They thought they had control, but they had no idea who they were dealing with.

And still, despite everything, she missed him.

The thought made her stomach turn. How could she? After all he had done? But it wasn’t really him she longed for, was it? It was the illusion—the promise of love, of understanding, of something real. She had loved the dream, not the man.

“Did I love him,” she whispered, “or did I just love the idea of being loved?”

For so long, she had defined herself by how much she could give. She had poured her heart into others, hoping they would do the same for her. But it didn’t work that way. People who truly cared didn’t make you feel like an afterthought. They didn’t disappear when you needed them most.

She exhaled, the weight on her chest loosening.

Losing him—losing everything—had been the beginning of something greater. A rebirth. The life she had before had drained her, left her empty and disconnected. The destruction of it all had forced her to see the truth: she had been living for everyone but herself.

No more.

She didn’t hold onto the hope that he would come back. That version of her—the one who waited, who longed for answers—was gone. What she held onto now was her strength.

“I was real,” she said aloud, her voice steady. “My love was real. And no one can take that away from me.”

Forgiveness was complicated. The scars would never fully fade, but she wouldn’t let bitterness be her cage. She had to let go, not for him, but for herself.

She closed her eyes, envisioning the life she wanted—the life she deserved. A life filled with people who valued her, with peace, with purpose.

Sometimes, things had to fall apart to make room for something better. The pain had been a gift, forcing her to rebuild, to become stronger, to choose herself for the first time in her life.

And if someone out there was feeling this same ache, she wanted them to know—

They were not alone.

-sunshine